


Spooked

by hock



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Halloween, M/M, Secret Santa 2017, anyway heres some, conman, hock? posting Another New Thing without finishing other works?, kleinphy, mild triggerish warning for they visit a haunted house?, this is very gay, written for beaniejared on tumblger hes lit go check him out!!, you betcha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 12:45:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13146987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hock/pseuds/hock
Summary: Jared and Connor, stuck together in a "haunted" house on Halloween. What could go wrong?





	Spooked

**Author's Note:**

> heyo this is my secret santa gift for @beaniejared on tumblr!! i has so much fun writing this!! happy holidays you fucking gays

“Ow! Zoe, fuck off with that hairbrush or I’ll shove it up your ass.” Connor complained, swatting away her attempts to fix his hair.

“Connor, watch your language and be nice to your sister.” Cynthia tutted, adjusting the bow on her witch hat. Connor scowled, adjusting his headband. He turned to look at his sister, who was now brushing her own hair before dividing it into sections and braiding them. 

“Sorry.” He said without remorse. Zoe stuck her tongue out at him childishly, and Connor had to bite back the instinct to do it back. 

It had been her idea to go to a haunted house. Connor had been put off by the idea at first (weren’t they much too old to be celebrating halloween like that?), but, thanks to his sister’s constant begging and a fair share of bribery, he had agreed. It was later that he found out that it had actually been Alana’s idea. And she had invited Jared Kleinman, who had, in turn invited Evan Hansen.

So he was stuck going to a fucking haunted house that probably wasn’t even scary with a band of four other people. And that wasn’t even the worst part. The worst had to be that his mother was so positively delighted that he was spending time with other people that she had to eject herself into their lives, managing to be more excited than either of the siblings.

Most of Connor said that this was an awful idea, that he was going to absolutely hate it, and it would be better to fuck off and get high at some party. But, he had to admit, there was some small part of his that was excited for this recreation of his childhood. And, to be doing it with a group people who genuinely tried to understand and get along with him? He couldn’t ask for anything better.

That being said, the night would still probably be total hell.

“I have to run to the store for tea lights for our pumpkins, if you guys leave before I get back, just shoot me a text.” Cynthia stood, grabbing her car keys and running out the door.

Connor truly didn’t understand why his mother suddenly cared so much about Halloween. It was probably because she hadn’t had two children celebrating halloween together since Connor was thirteen.

Halloween used to be his favorite holiday. Forget Christmas, forget his birthday, Halloween was the one holiday where no one would look at his oddly, no one would expect any gratitude in return. There were no stuffy family traditions that he would have to sit through. It was just him and Zoe, dressed up in whatever costume they had decided on that year.

But suddenly, when he hit high school, his father deemed him too old to trick-or-treat, and insisted he stay behind. He hadn’t wanted any of the younger children to be scared. That part had stung, but Connor couldn’t fight back, instead having locked himself in his room for that first year, and fucked off to some party for all the succeeding years. But now, a glimmer of hope shown, through Zoe trying to genuinely connect with him, in the form of a group activity and a shitty sibling costume.

“Connor,” Zoe waved a hand in front of his face, snapping him out of his thoughts, “you here? Alana just pulled up.” Connor scrunched his face up and backed away from her hand, standing up. Zoe tugged at the wings on his back. “Be careful how you sit, you may fuck your wings up.”

“Oh, and I would hate for that to happen.” He remarked sarcastically. Zoe playfully hit him on the back of his head, grabbing his hand and tugging him towards the front door. He laughed sharply, letting the hint of a smile flit across his features. He looked at his sister’s costume, a pair of red devil horns in her hair and a belt with a pointed tail attached wrapped around her waist.

He was the angel, she was the devil. It was a classic role reversal, and Connor found it hilarious that Zoe had come up with the idea. He walked up to Alana’s car, the sun already beginning to set over the loose hills. Zoe ran past him.

“Shotgun!” she yelled, opening the car door to find Jared Kleinman already sitting in the passenger seat. “Get out, Jared.” she demanded playfully.

Jared Kleinman was something of an anomaly to Connor. He managed to worm his way into everything he ever tried to do, and refused to get out, like some disgusting parasite. However, something about him was endearing, something kept Connor pushing for more, always arguing back and forth. His insults used to sting, but now, the encouraged an equally shitty reply and from a light blush to bloom on his cheeks.

To say he had a crush on something as utterly repulsive as Jared Kleinman? Completely false. Connor swallowed at the thoughts, forcing himself back into the scene unfolding in this driveway.

“No way! I was here first.” He retailed. Alana leaned over, unbuckling Jared’s seatbelt for him. Jared bleated loudly, sending a sideways glance at the girl in the driver’s seat. “What the fuck? I’m being teamed up on, this is bullying-”

“Sorry, Jared. I’m the driver, I have final say, and I say that Zoe’s sitting up here. Better luck next time, bucko.” She smiled sweetly, letting Jared slide out of the seat, surrendering it to the smug look on Zoe’s face. Connor climbed into the backseat, watching for the disappointed look on Jared’s face when he, too, climbed in and saw that he was spending his time in the backseat with no other than Connor Murphy.

“Ah!” Jared yelled at the sight of Connor, “Hey there, Hot Topic, don’t worry, the halo doesn’t detracted from the whole edgelord persona.” Earlier in the year, Connor may have been angered by Jared’s remarks, but now, he knew that the brutal insults that they traded was just another type of banter, even if many thought that they were constantly at each other's throats.

“Oh, and I can see that my favorite asshole didn’t bother dressing up, he’s already scary enough.” Connor shot back. Alana snorted from the front seat. Jared fanned himself, false tears springing to his eyes.

“I’m your favorite?” He asked, batting his eyelashes, “I could cry.” He dropped his dramatics. “Don’t accuse me of not having a costume, Murphy. I’m not as uncultured as you think I am. It’s just in the back because I didn’t want to bend it.”

“He’s not lying.” Alana said from the driver’s seat. “I had to help him load it.”

“Whatever.” Connor grumbled, pulling his legs onto the seat. “Isn’t Evan coming?” He was not sitting next to Jared’s infuriating ass this entire car trip. It wasn’t that Jared even got on his nerves anymore, and that’s truly what scared Connor more than any haunted house ever would.

“Nope.” Alana responded. “He said Heidi managed to get the night off, and he thought it a haunted house would be too much for his anxiety.” Connor nodded. Evan would quite possibly flip shit at anything remotely scary. Even if Jared was annoying, he wasn’t prepared to deal with Evan bawling his eyes out. It wasn’t Evan’s fault either, and Connor made a mental note to tell him he was missed.

“So you’re stuck with me, edgelord.” Jared gested playfully. Over the past few months, his insults had lost their edge, sharp taunts becoming a form of playful banter between the two.

“Unfortunately, shortass.” He grumbled, looking out the window, the trees racing past highlighting the brilliant orange backdrop of the sinking sun. It would be dark soon, long shadows already sliding across the paved roads. Alana turned onto a small road, following signs for the haunted house. It was a recurring fixture in their small town, open only August through November, and apparently making a killing. 

“Woah, that’s a low blow!” Jared fired at him.

“Maybe because you’re so close to the ground.” Connor immediately shot back, smiling in spite of himself. 

“You’re so mean to me.” Jared pouted, but his words were laced with laughter. In the low lighting of the sunset, he looked like he was glowing. Connor took a spare moment to admire his face, but quickly shied away, quashing the warmth blossoming in his chest. Now was not the time to fixate on the entrancing fucker.

Alana turned into a heavy populated parking lot (the house was apparently a very desirable Halloween hangout) and maneuvered through the grid of cars, pulling into an open space. 

“Get out of my car.” She commanded, pulling out her keys and unlocking the doors as the lights blinked on. 

“Wow, someone’s bossy.” Zoe retorted cheekily, opening her door.

“Is that a bad thing, Ms. Murphy?” Alana teased. Connor saw a faint blush scatter itself on his sister’s lightly freckled cheeks and gagged.

“Get a room.” He jeered. Zoe turned and stuck her tongue out at him for the second time that night. He flicked her off in return. 

He exited the car, shutting the door after him. Jared had popped the trunk, removing his costume, a large white sign emblazoned with black letters.

“Nudist on strike.” Jared read his sign aloud, seeming very pleased with himself. He pulled the sign over his head.

“You think you’re so fucking funny, don’t you?” Connor asked him, biting his lip to stop from laughing.

“Oh Connor, darling, I don’t just think it. I know it.” Jared batted his eyelashes, slamming the car door shut so that the lights blinked off. Connor blushed at this appropriated pet name, but disguised it before it was too noticeable. The two followed Zoe and Alana towards the house, standing in a line with swarms of people. Alana purchased their tickets, smiling sweetly at the tired looking teen taking their cash.

“Okay, miss. There’s a few simple rules here. Firstly, no flashlights. It ruins the fun. Secondly, do not harm our actors. There are real people underneath that makeup. And, finally,” He delivered the line with tired impatience. “Try to make it out alive.” He looked like he hadn’t slept in days, and Connor truly felt sorry for him.

There were hundreds of people, all roughly in groups of four or five like their own. Many were costumed, too, bright wigs and long capes adding to the scene. Jared got far too many compliments on his cheeky costume, but that was just Connor’s opinion.

They followed the line of people into the front door of the haunted house, where they waited another ten minutes, (Within this time, Alana and Zoe had discreetly grabbed each other’s hands, but Connor chose not to say anything) and then were directed inside the house, the door slamming behind them, and with it, any light left fleeing from the room.  
Suddenly, the group was bathed in darkness. 

Connor looked around, immediately disoriented. He grabbed the closest thing he could find to steady himself.

“Murphy! Paws off!” Jared squawked, breaking the silence. Connor released Jared hesitantly, his eyes slowly adjusting to the room. 

“Zoe? Alana?” He called, hoping they weren’t too far. When no response came, he returned his grip to Jared’s shoulders. Jared grumbled in disagreement, but didn’t bother shoving Connor’s hands off as he had before.

“They probably went ahead of us already, no biggie.” Jared explained. Connor noticed the slightest hint of shakiness in his voice, smirking slightly in the dark.

“Well, we can’t just stand here forever. Let’s get moving. Maybe we’ll catch up?” Connor tried, reluctantly letting go of Jared to continue going what he hoped was forward.

“Maybe.” Jared replied from behind him, catching up so that they were walking side by side. They entered the next room, a large hallway dimly lit by two candles at the end. Portraits of all shapes and sizes lined the room, eerie faces with eyes far too realistic for Connor’s taste. He resisted the urge to once again attached himself to Jared, instead bravely leading the way, ignoring the way the eyes seemed to follow him, sticking to his neck like heavy molasses. 

They reached the end of the hall without incidence, passing by the final portrait. A hand shot out from the picture, almost like it was coming out of the painting itself, and grabbed Connor’s arm. He jumped several feet, and, judging from the small screech and the battery of curse behind him, a similar fate had befallen Jared.

“Piss off! Skedaddle! Get the fuck away! Shoo!” Jared reached down, unattaching the hand that was clamped around his ankle. Connor repeated the motion on his extra hand, the appendage shooting back inside as if nothing had happened in the first place. Connor turned back to look at Jared.

“That was…” He was breathing heavily.

“Terrifying? Invasive? Utterly petrifying?” Jared supplied.

“Any of the three. Let’s keep going.” Connor nodded, letting Jared lead the way. They turned into another room, a bedroom type scene. It was dimly lit as before, smelling musty and looking about the same. Connor pointedly tried to ignore the figure pointedly wrapped in white sheets in the childlike bed. 

Jared walked through with the same hesitance as before, holding his hands up on the defensive. Connor trained his eyes ahead, promising himself to not look backwards. The hairs on the back of his neck prickled.

“Who the fuck is touching my hair.” He squeezed his eyes shut momentarily. Jared whipped around, looking at him, his eyes widening. A slight, childish giggle sounded from behind him.

Whatever, Connor told himself, you signed up for this. And with that, he too turned around, finding himself face to face with a grotesquely mottled girl. She smiled a toothless grin, and had it been any other situation, Connor would have stopped to admire her makeup. But instead, his fight or flight instinct kicked in, and he turned to lock eyes with Jared, pleading for him to run.

Jared took his cue, flinging open the door and plunging himself into the darkness. Connor followed, taking extra care to shut the door after him. The two ran, side by side, through the dark hallway, not stopping to care, only wanting to reach the next room without encountering another creepy companion. 

“Connor, is it just me,” they had stopped running, both panting from the exertion, “or is this hallway getting smaller?” He looked around wearily. Connor’s eyes, now adjusted to the dark, looked into Jared’s beady small ones. He glanced around, coming to a darkening conclusion.

“I’m pretty sure it is.” He affirmed, cursing internally. Why had he let Zoe drag him out to this? He knew that there was no real danger other than maybe a few bumps or bruises, but still, if anything, this trip had proved that he was a bigger pussy than he thought. 

The hallway was beginning to shift, the painted walls slowly transforming into something softer and more constricting. Connor let Jared lead the way, resisting, for the millionth time, the urge to cling to Jared like a scared puppy. 

“This stuff is so fucking weird. I think it’s like foam or some shit.” Jared poked one of the walls experimentally.

“Do we keep going?” Connor asked.

“No, we dig our way out. Of course we keep going.” Jared retorted, sarcasm lacing his words, and took a step forward into the closing cavity. The two slid through the hallway, eventually turning on their sides to fit through. Connor found himself short of breath, the restricting cavern freezing the air in his lungs. Jared must have noticed something, because he spoke up.

“Just breathe, Murphy. It’s like music. In for four, hold for four, out for four.” He instructed, demonstrating the pattern on himself. Connor mimicked this, steeling his gut. He was not going to have a panic attack in the middle of a haunted house in front of Jared Kleinman. If not at the very bottom of his to-do list, it was very close to the end of “things I want to do in front of Jared Kleinman.” 

Jared was the first to push through, landing them in a very normal looking staircase. It was the first properly lighted room in the house, and Connor blinked, readjusting to the light. He and Jared shared a look of disbelief. This looked too good to be true, but they continued descending the stairs, finally reaching the door at the end of the flight. 

“God, this is the last fucking time I go along with anything Zoe plans.” Connor said, looking at Jared and shaking his head. Jared raised an eyebrow.

“Well, I’d say it was a bonding experience.” Jared reasoned. 

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” Connor retorted. They had stopped at the closed door, both too uneasy to open it.

“Wouldn’t you agree, Connie?” Jared batted his eyelashes. Connor would almost call it adorable, if the offending person was anyone but Jared.

“God, call me that again and I’ll punch your fucking lights out.” Connor threatened, but the heat wasn’t there. He found the term near-endearing, and the thought of that repulsed him so much that he shoved it to the back crevice of his mind, planning never to think of it again.

Jared finally reached for the door swinging it open slowly. Connor felt himself bracing for impact, thinking that something had to go wrong. He squeezed his eyes closed, tensing his tall frame.

And nothing happened. He cracked open his eyes, the door revealing a dark and musty looking room. It wasn’t appealing, but, then again, nothing about the excursion had been. He looked over at Jared, the portly boy shrugging weakly and stepping into the room.

A mechanical noise ripped through the air, and Connor instinctively looked over his shoulder. He swore, yanking Jared around so they both faced the bloodied mask of a ghoulish creature bearing a chainsaw. It stepped towards the pair, Connor gawking.

“Oh, for fucks sake!” Jared swore loudly. Connor grabbed Jared’s hand instinctively and bolted, dragging him through the dark room and into another, somehow even mustier room, the low hanging ceiling adorned with webs and spiders. Connor hoped they weren’t real, still gripping Jared’s hand. The two tore into the room, shoulders dripping with cotton webs, and stopped to catch their breath.

“Why are you such a pussy?” Jared asked between gulps of air.

“I’d ask the same of you.” Connor responded. Jared flicked him the bird, still clenching his hand tightly. Suddenly, the rip of the annoying, probably not even real (but still petrifying) chainsaw came back into earshot, and Jared and Connor locked eyes again. Jared bolted this time, yanking Connor along. The sound was getting closer and closer, and, even if Connor knew he wouldn’t get hurt, fear still coursed through his veins. Jared yanked him sharply, pulling him around a corner Connor didn’t even know existed. It was only when he heard a door slam had he realized that Jared had pulled him into a closet.

“Kleinman! What the everloving fuck!” Connor whispered-yelled, finding himself in a very compromising position. The closet was far too small for them, the near-crawl space designed to fit one person at most. 

“Shh!” Jared shushed him, “The bitch will pass, and then we’ll be home free. Just- just sit still.”

“I’m not doing much sitting-” Connor complained, heat rising in his cheeks. If they had been the same height, perhaps they would have found themselves nose to nose, but because Jared’s stature was small - and Connor’s was anything but - they stood awkwardly in a face to chest position, pressed tightly against each other.

“I get your fucking point, asshole.” Jared retorted. Neither of them had released the other’s hand. 

“So we’re stuck like this?” Connor asked. He couldn’t move without being pressed even closer to Jared, something he was trying to avoid at all costs.

“Unless you have any other ideas?” Jared replied, pushing further into the closet. It was pitch back all around. “I’m surprised we’re still alive and intact.”

“No, I’m surprised you’re still alive and intact. I’m quite murderous tonight.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Jared snapped playfully.

“Oh, blow me, Kleinman.” Connor quipped back.

“Do you know how unsanitary that would be?” Jared said after a moment of silence.

“I’d rather not think about it.” Connor cringed, wrinkling his nose in distaste.

“What would you rather think about, then?” Jared challenged.

“Not you.” Connor dissented.

“Oh, blow me, Murphy.” Jared parroted the phrase from moments earlier. Connor froze. Through their entire barrage of back and forth insults, the two had come closer and closer together, and he had just realized. He was sure Jared had noticed, too, as the shorter boy shifted uncomfortably against the wall. The air was suddenly thick, the space seeming much smaller than before.

“You fucking wish.” Connor’s words cut through the heavy, inexplicably hot, air. He was blushing, blushing heavily, and was grateful for the cover of darkness to hide the heat rising in his cheeks.

“I wish a lot of things, but definitely not that.” Jared tactfully replied.

“Like what?” He prompted.

And suddenly, Jared mouth was on his, their frames pushing together in the tiny, pitch black closet. It was warm and chaste, Jared’s soft lips pressing against Connor’s chapped ones. Connor breathed sharply, kissing back without thought. To say it was an ideal spot for a kiss would not have been accurate, but something about the illusioned terror waiting outside the door propelled them onward, Connor’s long arms wrapping themselves around Jared’s warm shoulders. They broke apart suddenly.

“What the fuck.” Was the first thing out of Connor’s mouth. 

“Look, if you want to say that never happened-” Jared offered, but Connor cut him off.

“No, do that again.” Connor said, and Jared obliged him.

Later that night, when they were found in that same closet by another tired employee, a noticeably disheveled Alana, and a furious Zoe (who had, as it turned out, gone ahead of them), both boys would deny anything ever happening. That being said, it didn’t take a scientist to figure out the change in chemistry between the two. On the drive home, when Jared fell asleep on Connor’s shoulder, Zoe whipped her head around to interrogated him. He simply smiled, told her not to worry about it, and she may want to invest in some concealer to cover the rather noticeable hickey on her neck. Alana laughed, Zoe blushed, and, in that moment, Connor decided that, just for a minute, everything would be okay.


End file.
